(no subject)
May. 19th, 2004 03:23 pmhmmm....not as devastated as i thought i would be....but definately a little on the perturbed side..
i just had a conversation with someone who knew "boytoy". Boytoy and i separated a while back....and while i truly think i'm well over him, a part of me is still wishful. I'm not hurt anymore. I've moved on. but hearing that he's dating someone already is a slight shock. made my eyes widen for a moment.
then a hood just seem to drop over my eyes. a million and one thoughts raced through my head. a million and one emotions accompanied them.
then i took a deep breath.
and exhaled. wondering.
how i really felt about the news.
i realized that i was okay with it. esp. if she made him happy the way i couldn't. i hope it lasts for him.
then i realized a small part of me felt angry. angry at him for not making an effort to keep in touch more often. bastard.
ah well...
it's okay. i suppose. we all move on to bigger and different things. for him...he moved on with someone....as for me...i moved on with other things...still bashing on boys tho. *snickers* it's so much fun to do! got back to my anime obsession again....totally obsessed with Naruto.
overall...i don't regret anything about it. It was nice to have a positive experience of a relationship. Shows how crappy the prior ones were. ah well..
i am free to obsess over Hayate Kakashi! dammit..i want a sexy silver-haired ninja for christmas! :-P
i just had a conversation with someone who knew "boytoy". Boytoy and i separated a while back....and while i truly think i'm well over him, a part of me is still wishful. I'm not hurt anymore. I've moved on. but hearing that he's dating someone already is a slight shock. made my eyes widen for a moment.
then a hood just seem to drop over my eyes. a million and one thoughts raced through my head. a million and one emotions accompanied them.
then i took a deep breath.
and exhaled. wondering.
how i really felt about the news.
i realized that i was okay with it. esp. if she made him happy the way i couldn't. i hope it lasts for him.
then i realized a small part of me felt angry. angry at him for not making an effort to keep in touch more often. bastard.
ah well...
it's okay. i suppose. we all move on to bigger and different things. for him...he moved on with someone....as for me...i moved on with other things...still bashing on boys tho. *snickers* it's so much fun to do! got back to my anime obsession again....totally obsessed with Naruto.
overall...i don't regret anything about it. It was nice to have a positive experience of a relationship. Shows how crappy the prior ones were. ah well..
i am free to obsess over Hayate Kakashi! dammit..i want a sexy silver-haired ninja for christmas! :-P
VeilSdeGTO
Date: 2004-05-20 12:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-20 12:49 am (UTC)It's a crappy feeling, I know I've been there. Stupid, stupid boys.
You are actually being very mature about the whole thing.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-20 03:00 pm (UTC)Re: VeilSdeGTO
Date: 2004-05-20 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-21 01:32 am (UTC)VeilSdeGTO
Date: 2004-05-21 10:57 am (UTC)Re: VeilSdeGTO
Date: 2004-05-21 03:23 pm (UTC)well...i am feeling a lot better than i did two days ago....but i think i'm still worrying over it since i'm not sleeping all that well.
I will definately give you a call around 5pm....when i get off of work. *huggles*
no subject
Date: 2004-05-21 08:44 pm (UTC)